Last night....talkin' bout last night

What a day-slash-week this has been. It was so busy and crazy and slightly broken and I forgot sometimes how good I have things.

Well, my dad's birthday was yesterday. He turned the ripe old age of 71. And he doesn't look it or act it. It's pretty incredible. Most folks figure him in the 60-65 range. These days though he talks like he feels old as the hills. The hills are sooooooooooo much older than he is.

It's this time in his life. For the past few years people have been dying and it's depressing. I know it must be so depressing. He is healthy and strong but has felt this fear. He needs to escape for a bit and realize that he isn't there yet. He will have his time. But, you can tell when you look at an old person that they aren't here for long. And he is not THERE yet. I worry that he won't get happy again and that makes me sad. He's got so much to enjoy I want him to enjoy it. He probably has 15 good years and a couple crappy really unhealthy ones. But if stays down like this, that won't happen. Attitude is such a strong determining factor. Most of all, I want him around to meet the kids i have someday, selfish girl that I am.

Anyway, an excellent man and family friend died recently. The funeral was scheduled for, of course, Dad's BIRTHDAY. Argh! How ironic, right? So we had made some birthday plans before we heard about this but it kind of took the wind out of the celebration plans for him. Oh, they guy was 10 years older than dad and had lung cancer.

Anyway, he and mom decided we'd go to cirque de soleil in a couple of weeks instead of getting together for the actual birthday. I thought that sounded quite excellent, but also thought he still needed a bday fiesta of sorts. Cville Yoga Buddy had already planned to visit them that night and she decided to bring a giant and wonderful german chocolate cake. We collaborated on timing once I knew their schedule.

Then I called r'noke Gym Buddy early Friday morning with the absurd suggestion that she ride with me to c'ville, spend a few hours with my family, and then ride home again all in one night. Not only did she agree to come along: she agreed with a happy eagerness that touched my heart. And we had a great time. We talked and laughed the whole way there and back, deep and meaningful, shallow and silly and once again I realized how lucky I am. How many people have as many deep and powerful relationships as I have had in my lifetime. I am so freakin' rich with lovely strong intelligent women!

Anyway, when I started writing I wanted to get around to the craziness of my week: windstorm and canceled school festival, adding another school and changing my schedule, being given conflicting directions to enforce cancellation of a school program, principal observation with a schedule change and no planning, and a crazy crick in my neck creating pain for an entire week. Work has definitely been the low place in my life these days.

But then one night with friends who are willing to spend hours with my parents because it is important to me reminded me of what's really important. Thanks ladies.

new friends

i have been reading starhillgirl's blog and truly been enjoying the chance to hear her voice. I like this world where you can be close and still far away.

Well, thru her I discovered that it is blog month. I have been trying to get myself to write more recently and this seems like a good way to get it going. of course, it is too late to be truly an entire month (and i will never be in the same class as her and her ilk) but i think i should try to write a little.

i was planning on going to yoga tonight. i invited my friend from work. I'll call her Frindle (I like the code names). Anyway, she doesn't go out after dark (I am helping her change that!) so this yoga night was actually a kind of big deal.

Moments before she arrived at my house i got a call that my dear, flaky yoga teacher wasn't feeling like practicing tonight. Ug. I felt bad but we adapted. A short walk and then Wild Flour dinner. Besido (another code name!) arrived and off we set.

Frindle was nervous. She doesn't walk much in the city, particularly downtown. A lot of people around here really think downtown is dangerous. I guess, although Roanoke is small, it can be scary. It's actually an oddly urban environment with a lot of poverty. She did great though. I didn't make her walk through the park (though i was tempted). I am not a mean person. I just like to force myself through fears. That doesn't work for everyone though.

Anyway, we had called a good walk. Frindle and I talked to each other while Besido answered the ringing of absentee yoga teacher's call and let her know how much we like her class. Teacher was feeling angsty because she hasn't been practicing outside of our classes. I think Besido managed to let her know that we really enjoy what she does and really prefer Her to Not Her. She leads a wonderful class and we like what she does. Maybe we should just practice together and not call it a class and then she will feel better about it.

Arriving at the restaurant we sat and ordered our complicated water (no ice). Our new friend joined us (i can't come up with a code name yet. I will call her Letter A for now). We had a really nice time getting to know each other.

four women
one married with kids, 33
one single, 33
one married but separated, 34
one in a long-term relationship, 28

all happy and unhappy
all wondering
all lost and found
all not quite sure
all on there way

Letter A referred me to Chris' Rock's stand-up: married and boring vs single and lonely
It's not that black and white. We are all so different. We are all so interesting. I love it.

i wonder what the future will bring me
i wish i could still have the sense of permanence i had as a youngun before i knew better
but today, this night, was so perfect.
i like to think it will carry on.
but us humans with our personalities and our needs and our loves will move on (funny, i meant to say lives not loves but i think it works that way too)

i have a fortune i carry in my wallet
it's easy to make friends but difficult to keep them

i agree. and now i need to go to sleep. student teacher conferences and the police concert will tire me tomorrow!